Your First Birthday in Heaven

Today marks the first birthday my Mother was not here, touchable, tangible, huggable. But oh, she was here in spirit. Even without her present, that absolutely could not stop me from honoring and celebrating her life and legacy. I have posted many, many posts on social media along with some wonderful videos of the birthday girl singing. They are sure to put a smile on the viewers face.

I woke up several times last night, smiled, and whispered out loud, “Happy birthday, Mama.” I had a dream that I was feeding her at the facility where she lived the past ten years. I’ve never had a dream like that. She looked great and was wearing a red mock turtleneck.

Yesterday, my daughter, Mel, told me she wanted to go to the gravesite with me this morning. I was so touched by her gesture and thoughtfulness. Before I got dressed for my trip to the graveyard, I made my coffee and began watching the news when suddenly Mom’s dear friends’ picture showed up on the birthday announcement segment on our local channel. Mom and Mrs. J. had celebrated birthdays together my entire life and oddly enough even shared the same name. Today Mrs. J. turned 90 years old, two years younger than Mom would have been. I started tearing up and thought, Aw, poor Mrs. J doesn’t have her buddy here anymore. Within a few minutes, I got my emotions under control when I received the sweetest text from my niece. Cue the tears, again! About thirty minutes go by and in my door walks Chrissy, one of my daughters, bearing gifts. She had the day off of teaching school and brought me a slice of Mom’s favorite cake, Italian Cream Cake, along with a flower arrangement with some of Mom’s own flowers that she had incorporated in her recent wedding. She crawled onto my lap and I cried. My two daughters were there to support their ole Mama and all this transpired before 7:30 a.m.

We spent time at Mom’s grave as I recounted stories of when my Dad first died and some of the idiotic things I did. One such story was after I knew my husband was THE one, I brought him out to the graveyard to “meet” my dad. Yes, I knew my Dad wasn’t there, but I was only 18. That was my “first rodeo” in the arena of grief. My husband humored me over and over and over again. What a keeper.

After we left the cemetery, we came back home, shared the one slice of cake and just talked. I thoroughly enjoyed this much-needed time with my girls. Chrissy told me she planned to take me out to lunch as well at my Mom’s favorite fast-food restaurant, Dairy Barn. I think they thought of everything. It made for a much better day all the way around.

Lastly, my sister and best friend called me to make sure I was okay. I was glad to report that I was and I am. One day at a time sweet Jesus.

With a smile and a happy heart, Happy birthday in heaven Mama!

Elle